Sometimes spam emails just make me smile:
Hello
My name is Vladimir Kupriyanchuk
I developed an interest in you.
If you have the opportunity then please send me information materials and souvenirs (stickers, pen, t-shirt, notepad, poster or other.)
I would be very grateful.
This charming fellow contacted me the other day and I was terribly tempted to send him a little goody bag in the post. He sent me his address and everything! I could give him one of my pencils with a personally chewed end, several notebooks with my very own handwriting in and there's an unwashed T-shirt in the laundry basket that he might like.
It was so much nicer to read his message than some of the others, though, particularly as I'm not actually 'seeking sluts to fuck' at the moment. (But apparently there are plenty in my local town and all you have to do is 'click here to enter'. Good to know.)
