Yesterday I found a small snail on the wall. “Nothing unusual about that” you might say – but the thing is, it was on an inside wall. Going up by the stairs, if you please. I assume it came indoors when the window was open but how it got that far without being spotted surprises me – I’m wondering if, like wheelchair-bound Andy in ‘Little Britain’, it waited ’til nobody was looking and then sprinted across the threshold, before returning to a more sedate and gastropod-ish crawl the second it was aware of watchful human eyes.
Anyway I cheerfully picked it up and relocated it to the garden where it can crawl or sprint or even fly for that matter. Who knows what they get up to when you’re not looking? I have a great fondness for snails, and slugs, and other slimey, creepy-crawly, multi-legged - or no-legged - things. Last week I found a large yellow slug – bright yellow, it was, like it had eaten something radioactive. I doubt there are any discarded bits of plutonium buried amongst the petunias so, on consulting my favourite trusty wildlife book, I reckon it was a Great Black Slug. Bit of a misnomer there but the Great Black Slug can come in many colours – even a high-visibility-jacket shade of yellow. I’d have thought a more imaginative name could have been awarded to such a creature but in this case the folks at the Institute Of Entomological Nomenclature* must have been having an off-day. Perhaps they’d exhausted themselves after an afternoon of coming up with more elaborate names for moths: Ghost Swift, Mother Shipton, Rosy Footman, Scarlet Tiger, Sallow Kitten and many more that conjure up images of all things other than moths. (I’m sure I once heard Sallow Kitten on John Peel...)
Well I don’t know what that little snail was. It was possibly a White-Lipped Banded Snail (which apparently can also be dark-lipped and devoid of bands). As the Gnat said to Alice in Wonderland, “What’s the use of their having names if they won’t answer them?” “No use to them,” said Alice, “but it’s useful to the people who name them, I suppose”. Hmm. I think I’ll just call my snail Brian.
* they name slugs and snails there too, apparently
I have just the stupidest smile on my face watching that ! Thank you. Is it any wonder a generation of British youth felt the need to take drugs to try to (unsuccesfully)replicate the feeling that you get from watching five minutes of Magic Roundabout !
ReplyDeleteSo true. Let's hear it for: The Magic Roundabout, The Clangers, The Herbs, many more too numerous to mention, and....the stupidest smiles!
DeleteThat is everyday, and often twice a day, in our house.
ReplyDeleteIt's so funny too....'cause my wife freeeeaks out every time she finds one. She's even got the Boy on slug patrol.
I'll be on the other end of the house and hear...
"Maaaah MUH! There's one in the cat dish."
"AAAARGHHHHHHH...HON-EEEEEE! It's a another slug! AARRGHHHH!"
I had to get a baby one off the wall while typing...hahhaha.
Oh I had no idea! But from what I've gathered about some of your wildlife over there the fact that they're not venomous, can't bite your arm off, and slow-moving (understatement) makes me think: what's not to like?!
DeleteSnail lovers of the world unite. Mrs Bear does have a bit of a problem with slugs and snails as they attack our garden on a daily basis but I say 'live and let live'. A bit for them and a bit for us. They have their rights.
ReplyDeleteGood hear that Magic Roundabout tune again. Time for bed.
Yes I'm of the 'live and let live' variety too - I enjoy them as much as the flowers, it's just about perspective I reckon!
DeleteLot of them about at the moment, all the rain no doubt. My wife was talking to one in the garden on Sunday - his name was Brian too. She was asking him to move off the lawn before I came by with the mower
ReplyDeleteBrilliant drawing btw - you have a hell of a talent there
I like your Mrs already!
DeleteThanks for the kind words - quite an old illustration, that one, but it seemed a nice way to give it an airing again.
My 3 year old son is obsessed with them ever since I bought some slug pellets to prevent (annihilate) them from eating my Hostas. Says they are naughty for eating my plants. I didn't really want to expose him to that sort of wanton death and destruction just yet....lets face it, there's plenty time for it later.
ReplyDeleteHave to say I'm a fan of natural pest control - preferably hedgehogs and birds! Maybe you could satisfy your son's obsession with them and keep the Hostas relatively safe by setting up a decoy feeding station for the slugs/snails?! I used to feed them lettuce leaves etc as a kid in the hope that I'd be able to have them as pets. The pet bit didn't really work...(couldn't get a collar to fit) but it was fun for me watching them.. kept them, me and probably my mum's Hostas happy for a while anyway!
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