Friday, 29 July 2011

The great odds-and-sods drawer of life

In the manner of some deeply personal confession, I am about to reveal to you the contents of one of my drawers…

Well, at least this was what was in the very bottom once I’d removed several layers of similarly random objects. 

For some reason I think it makes quite an interesting image.  It’s one of those drawers, you know, the type we all have - the one with no name.  Perhaps it’s in the kitchen, or maybe in a study or spare room.  In an effort to label it here I’ll call it the great odds-and-sods drawer, into which go all those things that just don’t fit in anywhere else but which, for reasons not entirely understood, have been kept for years.

Amongst other things, you will find here:

- One cork from a celebratory bottle of champagne (I think someone once told me it was good luck to hang onto them.  But surely life is not long enough, nor is the drawer deep enough, to keep the cork from every bottle we’ve ever popped?)
- A tiny purse (only big enough to hold two 2 pence pieces, so pretty useless for non-Liliputians)
- Blunt scissors (file alongside chocolate teapots)
- The squeegee from a screen printing kit (the most important bit of the kit, the screen, is nowhere to be found.  I’ve no ambition to be a window-cleaner, so why was this kept?)
- One spare shower head (doesn’t fit…)
- Magnifying glass (I love this and use it frequently so it really shouldn’t be in here)
- Enough hair to stuff a small toy (but how do hairs get into a drawer? What’s more, they’re the wrong colour - whose are they?)
- Half a candle (that long white thing at the back is not a sex toy, just in case you were wondering.)

So I’ve moved things around, bagged them up and boxed like with like but there’s still a requirement for a specific container labelled ‘weird homeless things’ to house the strange piece of plumbing, curly wire and peculiar unidentifiable objects.  At the same time I know that if we ever do need one of these items,  I’d forget we had it or where it was and go out and get another one anyway.  So that renders the drawer pretty much useless…

It could make quite a good art installation, though.  There’s something about the juxtaposition of the unconnected inanimate objects, don’t you think..?


  1. We always used to write on champagne corks: date, event etc. When did we stop doing it? I don't remember.

  2. I like that idea John. I have a lot of catching up to do with the saved metal caps from above the champagne corks that the Mrs. and I keep, it might be had to add dates to them though. A wonderful post that reminds me of an Embrooks track called "In My Back Drawer"!

  3. Another top drawer post C! Actually, if that's all you've got left after your de-cluttering then mission accomplished!

    Like the idea of writing on champagne corks. I have saved a few but always end up throwing them out eventually...

  4. Thanks v much for comments! Well, the champagne cork got thrown you all say, writing on them might have been an idea, but unfortunately I don't know that one was for or if it brought me any luck... just hope there will be more bottles being popped in future (if my luck holds out now, that is!)
    What you don't see in that pic, A, is that I'd put all the other stuff from that drawer on the floor as I worked my way through it, and ended up putting half of it back! Still, some progress is being made, I think... (?)
    (Wilthomer - I shall have to check out that track, thanks!)


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