And she'd have us believe it was all Tom Jones and Petula Clark.
Here's one of her latest completed puzzle pages - it's that box on the right that caught our attention: Pink Floyd founder, ___ Barrett.
At least she would have done a better job of filling in a card than the advertiser who put this in a local shop window...
I'm not quite sure why they thought they didn't have enough room to complete the word TRANSIT on the same line - only two letters left to go... ! And we know they mean VAN and not NAN. Nor ITNAN even. Oh now I'm feeling a little bad for being so mean here (bloody Cancerian) because I know that reading/writing can be a huge struggle for some, but still... it might have been an idea to get someone else to write this card out.
Anyway, there can be no denying that the words on this food bag are perfectly clear:
They just seem a bit random! So, our jam doughnuts were prepared in an area that handles, amongst other somewhat unexpected things, Crustaceans and Lupin? I couldn't help checking mine for bits of crab claw and petals - it's just lucky I wasn't put off by the celery stalk poking out the hole. Something to dip in the jam anyway, which may or may not have contained strawberries.
Well done I just spat my coffee all over the computer reading this... in a good way of course. I'm off to find some mollusc jam.
ReplyDeleteOops! But thank you. I aim to please :-D
DeleteIf you can't find any mollusc jam I'll put some in the post for you (with a snowflake).
I'm quite keen to get my hands on some of that jam, too - don't lupin seeds get you stoned? Or are they highly poisonous...well it's one or the other.
ReplyDeleteKudos to your mother-in-law, by the way. My own "belle mere" has a far narrower cultural reach. She could name you most of the minor characters from Gilbert and Sullivan operettas, but that's about it.
It sounds like mollusc jam could catch on... perhaps with added lupin seeds for special effect?
DeleteIndeed, the belle mere (I do love a bit of French!) still surprises us - she texts, watches Big Brother, obviously knows her rock'n'roll and quite possibly enjoys a mollusc jam sandwich too, for all we know...
(Maybe your M-I-L could do with some lupin seeds??? Not to poison, of course, but just to get a new perspective on Gilbert and Sullivan?)
we are what we eat!
ReplyDeleteWell, that would explain why I'm so cheesy!
DeleteToo funny.
ReplyDeleteMississippi has the highest number of published authors in the U.S. and the highest illiteracy rate...that's just how we roll. I love handmade signs...and the handmade grammar and spelling. It's a nice middle finger to the notion that grammar represents some ultimate truth...or, that language can carry an expression perfectly.
I love those things. Why'd you block out the phone number. I'm interested.
The allergy warnings give me a headache...
"it's just lucky I wasn't put off by the celery stalk poking out the hole"
hahahaha
Thanks!
DeleteI can understand that about the illiteracy - some years ago I did a course on teaching adult literacy, followed by a year or so of voluntary work assisting an evening class and it was very revealing. The first class I was assigned to was adults with learning difficulties, so there were a few other issues there, but I did a bit with another group who didn't have learning difficulties - people who held down jobs and had families and got through life's ups and downs without ever having properly grasped reading and writing, for whatever reason - it was quite amazing how they got round things and opened my eyes hugely. That's why I didn't want to be too harsh about that advert - because yes know what it meant, just as you suggest...
I'd love to send you some of those jam doughnuts, though I suspect they'd be classed in the 'Items you cannot send in the international mail' category - I can just see the pictogram now...
Even dyslexics have to drive, whilst you're ma-in-law is definitely hiding a secret psychedelic past! As for those doughnuts, I'll pass on the crustaceans and molluscs.
ReplyDelete....yeah, I think I'll leave those doughnuts too, thanks!
DeleteI ate mine before even noticing the packaging, but I have to say - it was yummy..!
DeleteNoting that she got the spelling right... she could teach the Tranny owner a thing or two...
ReplyDeleteI wondered what you meant by 'Tranny' for a moment there, Furtheron!
DeleteHehe! :)
DeleteIt gives a whole new meaning to "one careful lady owner" ;-)
DeleteWhat can they be using those Lupins for?! I've now got this vision of the innocent-sounding bakery in reality looking like a mad professor's laboratory, with jars of pickled crab claws on one shelf and pots of lupin seeds with skull and crossbones labels on another... Now I think about it I'm sure the assistant who handed over those jam doughnuts had a strange and evil gleam in his eye...
ReplyDelete